Not LOOPID
Ok, now don't get scared. This is the "NOT LOOPID" list. It contains things better left unseen, but we brought them out into the light just to contrast with the LOOPID list. If you loose heart, just look over there, and you'll feel better. Without further ado, I bring you the list of things which, by the grace of Mike, have been deemed:
NOT LOOPID
- Flatulence
- Full Sized Satan
- Lawyers
- Cars with wheels that fall off unexpectedly
- Aluminum oxide
- Fud (ARA)
- Benito Mussolini
- Country Music
- Federal Taxes
- Federal Spending
- Smurfs
- Gargamel
- Smoke
- Bees/Wasps (stinging insects in general)
- Ice cream Gack
- Existentialism
- Armpits
- Dilandau
- Computer Farts
- The Cove
- Disney
- Simba
- Kenneth Starr
- Teen Angst
- Pigeons
- Lemon & Lime bitters
- Maxim Gorki
- August Strinburg
- Enemy Chemists (FF7)
- Biff
- Marxist PRACTICE!
- Rupert Murdock
- Bill Gates
- The Undead
- The Hokey-Pokey
- Most nicknames your mother gives you
- Fire alarm tests
- International A-class license tests
- Real life driver's license tests
- Netscape plugins designed to piss you off
- Microsoft
- Allen
- Hitomi
- Stairs, and the climbing of them
- Stalin
- The World's most Comfortable Chair
- Pens that explode while you're writing
- Mike's Flatulence in particular (thanks a lot John)
- Stupid credit card bills
- Bed frames falling on you in the middle of the night
- The inflation of air beds
- Homework
- 2 hour windows in which to do homework (esp. from 4am-6am)
- Happy Fun Ball
- Obnoxious Contractions
- Pointed sticks (shut UP)
- The REAL Spanish inquisition
- Henry Kissinger
- Nukes
- The Funk
- Being turned into a ghast
- Ebowear
- Huge battleships that resemble assorted sea creatures
- Otis
- Air conditioning in October
- Air conditioning when it's cold
- Intelligent Leftovers
- Insomnia
- Squalor
- Mondays
- Fish Funk
- French Paper
- Asuka
- Shinji
- Tenchi
- Axle
- Big Brother
- Stage Managers
- Eric Cartman (godammit!)
- The VAX
- The Hill (Ebo's high school)
- Disabled hyperdrives
- Republicans (individually and as a whole)
- Many democrats (individually, but not as a whole).
- Lush Spice
- Emperor Palpatine
- Old People in Cars
- Salacious Crumb
- Jabba the Hutt
- Being dead, mostly or all
- Spice Girls
- Being underenrolled
- Careless elbows that erase the loopid list
- Old, rancid orange juice
- Room temperature leftovers (intelligent or otherwise)
- Leftovers that are left on the floor, regardless of temperature or relative intelligence
- Extremely boring professors, an anonymous history prof. in particular
- Getting shot in the first two seconds of Kaos
- Level draining spiders
- Death knights
- Communist Anarchists who refuse to see the inherent paradox therein.
- "I'm CUTE!"
- Rubber Neckers
- Ebo's old Garb
- No Netscape access
- TWO F*****G PLANES! (if you are Ebo)
- Mr. Hankey
- Citra
- Multiple Midterms on the same day
- Loud Vibrato Lady
- Dishwashing
- Caples Washing Machines
- BEING ALONE
- Drillbits that bend when in contact with brass
- Frozen Juice Boxes
- Dorm carpet
- Fud (no umlaut)
- Big Stupid Bass
- Squalor
- Headaches
- Driving needles into your feet
- South Campus
- Take home exams
- ANY exams
- Planet Utah
- Ohio roads
- Otis running away
- Throwing smarties in our suite
- Calling it "October reading days"
- Waiting in line for the triple crown
- Frat Boys
- Boring Guest Speakers
- People taking the elevator to the second floor
- Being Oppressed
- Being Depressed
- Sneezing in Crowded elevators
- Death by Prince
- Juvenile elevator graffiti
- Too Many Babies
- Macs in general, specifically imacs
- System Errors
- Names like Humperdinck
- NOT HAVING A CAR
- 75% of AD Vision's releases
- The original Zeuda (???)
- Theory and WMNS30
- Evil Jello
- Evil
- C: drive error extravaganzas!
- Illegal operation shutdown messages
- Getting ink on your shirt
- Corporations
- Outdated TVs
- Not Enough sleep
- Squashed Squirrels
- A busted voice box
- Jesse Helms
- Loch Faircloth
- Toothless Muppet Laughter
- Cheesy J-Pop
- Princess Allura
- Tummy Aches
- Colds
- Chris Cook
- Laughter
- ARA closing randomly
- Head colds
- Leonardo dicraprio
- Lynn Minmay
- Not being allowed to have live christmas trees
- Math Labs
- The bad 3 Musketeers movie
- Brazil nuts
- Hall of Forgetfulness
- Football
- Waking up late
- Phone salsemen who call before 9:00 am
- Chemistry tests
- take home tests (for emphasis?)
- Joel's exam
- Too many stairs
- GROUP ASSIGNMENTS
- Blows to the head
- Gas tanks filled with water
- Chicken of the Sea
- 2 AM fire alarms
- Alarm clocks
- Programming
- Ghandi's Long-windedness
- Liver diseases
- Constipation
- The breaking of my garlic press
- ANY Greek or Roman involved in theater
- Medieval maps
- Gangsta-butt rap
- M.C. Hammer
- Hamlette
- Hamlette II: the Return of Macbeth
- 238 new mail messages
- Ebola J. Macrophage
- Rivers between You and Food.
- The last temptation of Leonard Nimoy
- Being clubbed like a baby lemur
- Being clubbed by a baby lemur
- Being Ebo when he's clubbed like a Baby Lemur
- Being clubbed with a baby lemur
- Being a baby lemur
- Being on fire
- "Bleeding Dandruff"
- Actually having to read the whole chem lab
- 8 flights of stairs
- 9 flights of stairs
- Etc.
- Wrinkled blisters
- When Papa John's thinks your delivery order was a take out and you don't get dinner
- Microsoft
- Microsoft Excell especially
- Cool Blue Raisin
- Using an entire parking space for one motorcycle
- Second guessing yourself on tests
- Ben
- Save us Cuteness
- Rocky-Top
- "must constrain...fist of DEATH!"
- Ben
- Nazi Cleaning ladies
- Motorcycles in Caples lot
- Intestinal Flu
- Fairy Tale expectations
- Middle of the night power outages
- Defacing the loopid lists
- LOSING the TAPE
- Goats
- Full loopid lists
- Death from On high
- system.out.println ("I am getting mad")
- SCA event directions
- Taking down the loopid board for days at a time
- Incompatible audio/video recording devices
- Failing your "walk upright" saving throw.
- Sparky, the electrical cord eating hamster
- Ebo's Teva slime
- Little munchkin power-gamers.
- The Baker of Babies
- "Suite Dynamics"
- Gold-Bond Powder
- Mike stealing your hat and taking your honor
- Unpacking
- Keys that do not work
- Split thumbs
- Stale bagels as projectiles
- Screwed up schedules
- not having a schedule
- Humidity
- Alien Love
- Ragweed
- Broken Lamps
- Telemarketers
- FAKE ones
- Broken Computers
- Improper punctuation
- Essays due on BAD poetry
- Alex mocking Rachel
- Confusion of LESSER proportions
- Purintanical people who erase any mention of the word or concept "yiff"
- People who misspell "puritanical"
- Cramps
- Disappearing refrigerator
- capitalist pigs
- republican pigs
- PAT BUCHANAN ORGY
- italiano of computers
- Dave's theory of scavery
- network access DENIED
- Sad things
- Level draining
- "Straightening up" one's room
- Pokemon
- Pimp-papa-Smurf
- Statistics
- purple dinosaurs
- Shock fiction
- The not loopid list turning harshly personal
- Russian Lit. take home finals
- Leaving your chess board behind
- Being locked out
- Groping hands of Doom
- Doc Locke
- The Beta's taste in music
- Skull Staples
- Finals
- COMPS
- When Noah "helps you out"
- When Mike "helps you out"
- Remaking Kenny as an elf
- Blade
- Conjunctivitis
- Two term papers due on the same day
- Dana Sterling
- A collapsed skuull
- Less than < inch of carpeting
- Not enough RAM
- Becca's sense of direction
- Furry plate, ARA style
- Waiting this long to buy a new loopid board
- Gene Simmons as Darth Maul (aka, Darth Simmons)
- Gene Simmons
- Darth Maul
- Loosing one's armor materials
- ICS dodging responsibility by ceasing to exist
- BATTLECRUISERS!!!
- E&M Homework
- Betas in the Belfry
- "Listing" to port
- Assuming a Supremely Perfect Being
- Morons
- Being single
- Virtual Singularity
- Intro to Ethics
- Ebo's Vulgar hula-Hooping
- No Cherry Coke
- Ugly Tartar Buildup
- Mindless Vandalism
- Bad Spelling
- Reformatting
- My Hair
- Your Hair
- Tron: Deadly Disks
- German AT
- Branime from Kellogs
- No Love from Brandon Cobb
- Prehensile Warts
- Tuesdays Wedsdays Thursdays
- being tenderized
- A.T. in general
- Bubonics
- groping your suite mates
- bombs
- earwig infestation
- Snapping minds
- Computers not starting
- Pink Goo
- Welcome to the Machine (the level, not the song)
- Welcome to the Mather
- Complete self sufficency
- Human spongiform encephalopathies
- stealth kissing
- not saving
- no scrubs
- The Wide Beam of Death
- The Quick Beam of Death
- The never ending Hot Dogs
- Two Hearts, a Dinosaur, a pair of rollerskates, and a thick skull
- Not having a printer (or a computer)
- Not USING Gauss' law!!!!!
- Big honking integrals
- Tank problems
- Inexplicable foot pain
- Fire extinguishers as sex toys
- The details of badger's cat story
- The Unbread
- Trash dominating the common room
- Dueling banjos
- Aaron Downs and lipstick
- The Corpse of Corn Man
- Killing Spiders
- Llolth
- The Betas playing loud music II
- The revenge of the Betas playing loud music
- Son of the Betas playing loud music, etc., etc
- 8:10 class EVERY DAY.
- Enemies with Nuke
- Runny Noses
- "Beefy" Spice
- Rodents of Unusual Taste
- Fungi of Unusual Size
- Rodents of Unusual Breeding
- Rodents of Unusual Social Standing
- Rodents of Unusual Stamina
- Rodents of Extraordinary Intelligence
- Cashew Chicken of Unusual Size
- Voodoo Chicken!
- The Scarlet Heiroglyph
- Rashes
- Chalk Full of Syphillis
- "Cyanide" Spice
- Passion Fruit Flavor
- FLOWER MAN.
- Korianus Quatsi
- Cracker Jack
- the Demons in My Hair
- the Demons in My Lair
- the degradation of MANLINESS
- Girly rip offs of MANLY cartoons
- Girly cartoons
- Death to 'Ralia
- Spontaneous hailstorms
- Madame Coles
- and what she teaches you
- Ebo's Urinary tract update
- Ebo's urinary tract sound-effects
- Sour Apple Pucker
- Vausages
- Freelance Assholes
- "The Ethics of Care"
- Drunk Joke
- Low-Rider toilets
- the Beverly Hillbetas
- Vicious coughing
- Puyo Banana (when it's not yours)
- The Fear
- People Who Snore
- People who Shrivel
- Pol Pot
- Mobutu
- Russell's Illness
- Being Caught While Defiling Government Property
- Lack of Sprite
- LCTD (Loincloth Transmitted Diseases)
- Corrupt Data
- Blue Screen of DEATH (aka the BSoD)
- The Collegian and All Articles within
- One Sided Relationships
- Three Sided Relationships
- No-Sided Relationships
- Misuse of THE LIST
- Heavy Water
- Alex's Hands after Chem Lab
- Panopticontinuum
- Lilith Fair
- Personal Insults
- Loopid Abuse
- Shining Force III
- Censorship
- Dr. Pengloss
- Confettii of Death
- The Disgusting Oreo Half
- Nuyen Meter
- Dead Squirrels
- Pink Squirrels
- ARA (as an extension of the Force)
- URL 404: File not found
- Italian Cruiselines
- Ulcers
- Ebo's Bowel Update
- Possible Death by Alligator
- Death by Alligator
- Ebo's Iron Hammer
- Slob +4
- Waking the Sleeping Shana
- Smoking the Adversary
- Singing Telegrams from Jesus
- Buddhist Altar Prices
- The Urge to just NOT SLEEP
- The Urge to JUST SLEEP...in class
- Non-Random Foot Pain
- Jamele's Random Sinage
- More Vegan Options from ARA
- The Fridge of SHAME!
- Booby-trapped fridge
- Clinical Depression
- Cow Portholes
- Not remembering your girlfriend's phone number
- Phantom JiffyLubes
- Spontaneous Amnesia
- Electronica Mayhem
- Auto Monopolies
- Brandon's Strategy
- Gai Fachs' Flaming Hand of Death!
- Open Sores
- SUV Death March
- "Mattress"
- Slush fund in DEBT
- Lupins
- Gravel Flavored Yogurt
- Ward 17
- Spending Five Hours Completing the map, just to complete the map
- Insults
- Random Legs
- The OMNIbrow
- Jamele's Hip-Hoppin' shock Troops
- Machiavelli's Silver Hammer
- "You must gather your party before venturing forth."
- Certless in Ravensbluff
- Baku Baku of Cthulu
- Burt Bacharach
- Jamele in your Hall
- Kirby's Avalanche
- Kirby's Dream Course
- All things involving the Twins
- The AV department
- Farting with reckless abandon
- drooling
- stigmata
- fungal infections of the third kind
- The Aztec Pyramid Scheme
- Spilling Ramen on yourself
- Sex with the wrong person
- Invalidate Lizzi
- Vechy
- Galstaff, Sorceror of Light
- Formatting
- Dan Donnelly
- Welcome to Windows 95... crashing.
- Hotspur
- Albatha Sweller
- Grease
- Jesus of Spiders
- Firey Dounuts of Hell
- ZORT!
- Drones with Monofilament whips
- Poisonous Girlfriends
- Poisonous gasses
- Lack of H drive
- Changing quotes
- The ol' dirty shogun
- Existance Denied
- AssiNES
- Fading Markers
- Incestuous Lesbianism
- The Kenyon Observer
- The Other Sample
- Cookie Crips
- Zanzibar, 6 years ago
- Never Ending Story, and all of it's damn spawns
- Genji Snake/Solid Genji
- Lopid and Not-Lopid
- The letter "me"
- Never ending ninjas
- Legitimating, stoical
- Zombie gerbil noises
- Defacement and Vandalism of the loopid board
- Lacking the skills
- Genji does Dallas
- Toxic Pizza Delivery
- Random Red Hand
- Random Obligatory J-pop
- J-pop sung by men
- Genji and the zombies that love him
- "Hitomi, it suddenly hurts to pee."
- facial cramps
- Soul Toast
- Tic Tac Domestic Problems
- Psycho Mantis says, "You like to play 'Roommate' don't you?"
- The Disgraced Loopid Board
- Permanizing the Loopid board
- The "Torrasque"
- Carnivorous Armpit Hair
- The Leap of Faith
- Mikeivorous ZooShanas
- Shaniverous ZooMikes
- Sgt. Slate
- Shaving Cream on C-8
- Spilling Rice on the Floor
- Tenchi: Stealth Shojo
- Office Furniture of the Wyrm
- Spirit of the Rutabaga
- Spirit of Donnelly
- Lag
- Dan Donnelly, old school
- The new, fresher Dan Donnelly
- Scraps, canine death machine
- 0 Degrees Fahrenheit
- The Kenyon Library Website
- Remote access DENIED
- Term Papers
- 444-9999
- death death death, suffering suffering suffering suffering
- "Oh look, my ass"
- Flying squid/Illithid Death Machines
- The night of dumb Raids
- Nappy equations
- Blisters
- You have become better at Dancing!(1)
- Active skill in elf undergarments
- Writing white wolf plot
- Demon Baby Drama
- Snow Dicks
- Brief Cardboard Aura/Spirit of Box
- Mighty Morphin Danzeiver
- Triscuit: a little bit of Middle Path in every bite
- Quarry!
- Morbad the Worst
- The 8 hour Spawn
- Leonardo DiCaprio
- Hunger eating at your soul
- Warm Liquid Goo Phase unsuccessful
- Buddhist Medicine
- Buffy the Vampire Slayer Barqs
- Block with a PISTOL?!?!
- Morrigan, suck-u-bitch
- Pages of Bones
- R.P.S
- Pookachu
- "They made me into TV"
- Not enough rice
- Mofos
- The towering pilliar of pomposity
- L. Ron Hubbard
- GOBLIN ASS!
- $17.15
- Dorky looking spears
- "There is intelligent life out there AND IT'S MOCKING ME!"
- Blown Transformers
- Random Cartoon Ass
- Ultra wedgie
- Ace Murder
- Gobbets of Flesh
- Chainlink EVERYTHING
- Compuserve's cancellation department
- No one did the costumes for "cats"
- Gay Pride Youshi
- Energizer Youshi
- Low Baby Output
- The New Kenyon Webpage
- "Gives-Klaives-to-vampires"
- not living where you live
- scrappy doo
- Bio tests
- Bio-jesus
- Watching all of LAIN in one day
- "Sweet Bean Roll"
- "It's fucking freezing out here Mr. Bigglesworth!"
- "Can the class stay over just 3 more minutes?"
- "Three more minutes!"
- Harry Itagaki, the tyrant of Time
- Irregardless
- The Racetrack Principle
- "Wow! It's snowing in here!"
- Razorblade+Pinky+recital
- sawing the lip
- Housing
- non-waterproof signage
- Snow in March
- Sargasso of "TOO MANY"
- Skunky much like beer
- Truth or Dare
- "Black Metal Ball"
- life is a lemon and I want my book back
- evil with a side of chaos
- verichella being tortured for seven days
- your mom being tortured for seven days
- emnity of taxi cabs
- a 300lbs man dressed as chibi usa
- Beverly Hill Giants
- Only 80th level gengiro
- Conartist-whore duality
- iambic pentameter with spondees and trochees
- your mom with spondees and trochees
- all labor camps
- dork-of-a-man (DOAM)
- Giant phallus of death
- Mead from tentacle terrors
- that most uncomfortable of places
- Squall's inner monologue
- tree magnets
- Eva Unit OTIS
- Phantom Man
- Three dollar paper
- being a "kick-ass-bitch-ass-whore"
- two dollar bills
- sounds like "sensual blast of sperm"
- rosary
- siberian labor camp
- Being a bitch ass whore
- EVIL
- Fungal Infections
- Summer Send Off!
- Ongoing squalor
- "Get out of my rectum!"
- you can't always get what you need
- but if you try sometimes, you still won't get what you need
- illegibility
- Moe
- Bushido sexuality
- "ethnic cultural background"
- people who make fun of disabilities
- grinding the pagoda and not getting the tape
- job limbo
- being burnt out and disheartened
- lung infection
- allstus
- jobs not calling
- shit demons
- fiz-weak
- Crazy republicans
- Not checking for spelling before sending an allstu
- the vax saying, "License Terminated"
- Senior slumping sophomore year
- try to next chance
- Thunder force V... be over?
- TB
- coughing up blood
- Mme Bovary
- heat
- loss of funding
- the relentless pursuit of infection
- stock options in the "entertainment industry"
- Mr. Koonce
- Country Nipple
- January in April
- Ham on a Cookie
- Tongue on Chocolate Cake
- Garum + Marzipan
- Buchanan of Borg
- Daphne Loves Her Beaver
- Post-Culinary Emissions
- Beta music #4Improv. Techno
- "The Sky is big and the sun moves slow"
- Sunburn
- 3000 years of history, 12 years of peace
- "oh Kenyon we are like footslashing"
- The Nanosecond Recycling Fill
- Trading Sex for Pot
- Unequal Sample Sizes
- Lacking a Circadian Rhythm
- Bowman
- The "By Bunga Bunga" exam
- Little Box of Evil
- Getting sick the day your vacation starts
- Loading screens of imminent epilepsy
- Carbonated Ass
- Having to add the br HTML tag to over 1,400 individual items of loopidity and not loopidity.
- having to replace them with li tags...then having to close the tags
- Freeservers attempting to eat the lists.
- The eternal cash sink that is computing
- Public Vomit
- Now entering: Debt. Enjoy your extended stay!
- Sisyphean 1/2 mile Mulching
- A farewell to Cars
- Aggressive Auto Relocators
- The Aggresive Pursuit of Stupidity
- The baking Alarm
- Babysitting Lodoch
- Most Robust Rowing Simulation
- Survival horror Morning
- In Mike's Restless Dreams
- Death by Lethal Corn!
- Emily, bringer of Plague
- Spontaneous Demons of the Interweb!
- Target is Already Dead
- Attacked by -NONE-
- You were ? for 11 points of damage!
- We're at mo, mo
- Problem solving through Whining
- Packet Bowling
- Relativistic Statistics
- Crusading Against Heterosexuality
- Masters of Fing Shooey
- The Unseasonable Snow of Our Discontent
- Yellow Cab of DEATH!
- Freballing Weightroom Homos
- Lizzie
- Ninja scroll, a modern love story
- Meamon Schmeamis
- Cait Sith
- LOPID
- corporate america EATS your favorite web comics
- Fiery Death!
- Large Supreme Lovers
- Gimped be the Theurges
- "In and ideal world"
- Fish ice cream
- "Mmm, I smell FISHCORN!"
- No spinnach, not even for ready money
- Operators are standing by, and tired, sore, and their shit is broken, and for FUCK'S SAKE FIX IT YOURSELF!
- Way Too Young Marriage is GO!
- Iron Man Marathon Relay Experiments IN GOD DAMN TRIPLICATE
- Time Flies when you're going to HELL in the morning
- Assberries
- The Epoch of Unemployed
- George W. Bush, America's Emperor
- Gulf Wars, Episode 2
- "AIDS is the Gay Plague"
- "I BOTOX"
So that me may all be aware of the horror, please feel free to add your suggestions.