Monday October 25, 2004

The positive side of being a foreigner in Japan

9:25 PM JST

I got served famous Taisho kuri-shotchu (chestnut liquor) by the guy who FUCKING MAKES IT. No shit. He was completely wasted and took great care in showing me how to get ice all over the place while trying to get it into the cup and then filling the whole glass with expensive Hibudaburi (or something like that). Now there's a guy who loves his work.

This was at my high school's 50th Anniversary party, which was after the entirely useless 50th Anniversary ceremony. I was quite bitter about having to fund the ceremony, along with the rest of the teachers, and so it was nice to have a big party and get drunk with all the jerks who made me pay for the privilege of sitting outside of the ceremony and doing absolutely fuck-all. Thankfully, I did not have to go to the ceremony itself, which consisted of a bunch of old men talking about nothing in particular in Japanese for way too long. I did, however, attend the speech of a famous actor, which was much along the same lines for me since I don't speak Japanese. This speech preceeded the ceremony and was the main cause of our debt. Why the teachers and other townspeople had to pay 1 million yen for some guy to come completely unprepared to speak for 1 hour and 20 minutes is beyond me. I was amused when the guy in front of me fell asleep and started snoring at opportune times. I spent the rest of the speech trying NOT to follow suit and imagining that there were hot men in my town who speak English, are my age, and aren't afraid of me.

But this is supposed to be about the positive things. Ah, yes. The party. So, we had an excellent taiko performance from some students, and then several members of the Taisho Town old boys' club broke open 2 sake barrels with big mallets. I and another teacher then had the honor of serving them sake out of the barrels with little dippers. The rest of the dinner was pretty uneventful, besides being served shotchu from the master. And seeing the soccer coach cram a whole cherry pudding cake into his mouth; he said that was the 5th one he had eaten. He is shorter than me. On the walk to the nijikai, or second party, he started teasing Hamaguchi-sensei by calling her "beach mouth", a direct translation of her name. With much glee, I started calling him ke-ki guchi (cake mouth--it loses amusement value in the translation). Then onto the nijikai, where I spent most of the evening trying to refuse drinks from people (they had already given me three!) and eating a lot of roasted garlic and fried cheese thingies. Most Japanese women don't drink and get silly at parties, as that seems to be the mens' job. Being a foreigner, all of this goes out the window and I can basically do whatever I want. This meant a lot of talking and laughing with the guys in my office, which was really fun. It meant some horsing around with my principal and favoritest JTE ever, and wearing lots of other peoples' ties. Mostly, it meant that I went home a lot less digruntled about having to shell out so much money for the old fart actor and once again enchanted with my silly, lovely coworkers.

Today I got my tired ass out of bed to go teach an open class for junior high school students in Kubokawa. We had fun teaching them about newspapers, reading an article about a Malaysian man who has been married 53 times, and talking about needs vs. wants in various cultures. I was a bit nervous, but they were all just so gosh darn interested in my foreignness that I could have been picking my nose and hopping around on one foot and they would have clapped in appreciation. Sometimes it is really nice to be unconditionally loved.

Saturday October 23, 2004

Don't let the bed bugs bite!

10:06 PM JST

I am so tired. It's amazing how tired you get working more than 5 days in a row, even when you have an easy job like me. I have to work this weekend for the "Bunkasai" or culture festival, which is fun, but why can't you have it during the week? It's not like we then have classes--the school is actually closed for the Monday and Tuesday afterward! I can see why the employees of the Industrial Revolution banded together for the 40-hour work week. Ok, I am going to stop complaining and go to sleep now. Sleep, hummm, yessss....

Thursday October 21, 2004

One size fits all = boobs around your waist

8:18 PM JST

Dear store-bought Halloween costume designers of the world:

What the hell is wrong with you? Are you sure you finished design school? I know that it's difficult to make costumes that fit people and look cool, but, um, that's your job. Really, I think I might lose hope and look for another career if I ever produced something so ugly as the giant black PVC vinyl GARBAGE BAG I received in the mail the other day. So I have some suggestions:

1. When designing a movie costume that is supposed to be form-fitted and made out of PVC vinyl, use sizes.
2. Don't charge me a ridiculous amount of money for crap-ass construction techniques. If I paid the equivalent you charged me for a dress, it would not have a hole in the armpit and gathers in flat seams.
3. If you are going to make something that looks like complete ASS, just be as lazy as you can and don't bother putting any seams in. Then it will look like just another cheapass costume, no problem. When you put seams that manage to make it look worse than a shapeless bag, then it really looks like FAILURE instead of cheap laziness. People start to ask if the costume was purchased on the Schottenstein's discount rack. Or perhaps it looks like you were going for evil deformed versions of the characters, in which case you should sell them with fake moustaches and cigars ala. the stunt doubles in Space Balls.
4. If you really must use one size, don't err on the side of unusually tall with large breasts and no waist. I guarantee you it will fit NO ONE. NO ONE WANTS TO WEAR A VINYL SACK!

I started serious work on the infamous Halloween costume tonight. Despite buying one of those new-fangled store-bought costumes (I don't have consistent access to a sewing machine here), I am going to have to take the whole damn thing apart and put it back together again in order for it to NOT look like a big ugly bag. Seems I shall have to suck it up and use the school machines again. Perhaps I will talk myself into the $100 sewing machine I found at Jusco--there's nothing wrong with the school machines, I just don't like to look like a COMPLETE slacker. Unlike the absolute fucktards that made my costume.

Wednesday October 20, 2004

Tell me your deepest, darkest voting secrets

1:40 PM JST

I fell asleep last night right after dinner and slept most of the rest of the evening. We have another typhoon on our hands and one following on its heels over the weekend. These typhoons sap all my energy away and make me want to vege forever.

On a more motivated note, I have been asked to speak at the next English teachers' union meeting on November 7th. When a JTE asked me to do it a long time ago, he suggested a topic related to team-teaching and I was not enthused. But today he has asked me to speak about something political in America and I get to pick the topic. So I've decided to write about the presidential election, and I need your help. Please post in the comments about the issues that concern you most in the election. You can post about anything, though I think the most relevant topics to the Japansese are those concerning Iraq and foreign policy. Tell me why they concern you; don't just post crap comments like, "BU5h R00lz!" or "K3rry is teh BOMB" because that is entirely useless to me and I will delete it. I want to hear about emotions and rational arguments because both are important factors in voting. If you aren't going to vote, tell me about that, too. Though I can't guarantee you won't be harangued with encouragements to vote afterward! Ok, GO!

Monday October 18, 2004

Ohio Democratic Voters' Guide

7:42 PM JST

So far, I have received 4 mailings from various Republican candidates and the party at my Japan address. Dems, what gives? You've sent me NOTHING?! Ok, I know you're busy with those swing states, so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. In lieu of canvassing for voter registration in my home town, I dutifully present, to absentee and normal voters alike, my Ohio Democratic Voters' Guide.

Random Gratuitous Thoughts

4:45 PM JST

• Someone in Japan has recently covered the "Hey, Mickey!" song in squealy Japanese. As if this were not enough to make me want to RUN RUN THE FUCK AWAY, my students play it EVERY DAY during the school cleaning and it makes me want to KILL MICKEY WITH MY FIST.
• On my way out, I overheard the soccer coach's phone conversation. The only words I could make out were "pink" and "frosty rose".
• It's raining and my car smells like hot dogs for no known reason.
• On the train ride home last Friday, I fell asleep and began dreaming of cafe au lait. I woke up in the midst of drinking to find my lips moving seductively as though I were snogging a cup of coffee. The Japanese girl opposite me was staring.
• What is so Christian about debt consolidation, anyway?

For loopid or for worse

4:43 PM JST

Recent search referrers (mostly thanks to the loopid list):

• which gas is in packet of crips from getting squashed (This one is all loopid list material)
• alligator or caoine (Loopid list + blogs I read)
• loopid (Oh, the joy I feel!)

Sunday October 17, 2004

OMFG Kubokawa

4:16 PM JST

Finally, you too can know the beauty of OMFG cheese and bacon bread.

Alright, enough about food and doomsday bees. It's time I introduced you to Kubokawa. Kubokawa is the largest of the towns I teach in; the high school has about 260 students and I teach there on Tuesdays and Fridays. I really like teaching there because all of the students are really curious and good-spirited, no matter their academic level, interest in English, etc. It takes me about 30 minutes to get there by train, and the train only runs 7 times a day. I leave at 7:22 AM; it costs about $5 to ride one-way. I usually lay down on the bench in the mornings and doze my way in, much to the amusement of my students. Then I shake my tired ass out of the seat and off the train and stumble to the ticket office. By the time I get there, I am mostly awake again and hand my ticket to the guy with an "Arigato Gozaimasu!" Sometimes I use the bathroom, that is to say one of the TWO clean public restrooms in the whole of Japan. Besides the obvious, I know it is clean because I often see the 80 year old hunchbacked obachan cleaning and feel sad that someone younger and less, well, hunchbacked isn't doing it for her. In the bathroom, I usually encounter a couple of students. I know they wait for me to leave so that they can go into one of the stalls and smoke. It makes me sad, but I fear that if I say anything I will lose all respect and friend-ability in class. I also suspect that they will do it no matter what I say because they are 18 years old and clearly I have NO FUCKING CLUE. But they are sweet and smile at me and ask me about my new coat. So I chat a bit and walk onto my next stop: the bakery.

Now, I have always had a special fondness in my heart for bakeries because I love starch and yeast infections. Right. But really, I love bread unconditionally. Nagayama Bakery in Kubokawa is no exception. In fact, it appears in my travels at about the exact time that my first breakfast has worn off, and so I can conveniently buy more food and stave off my voracious appetite until about 11:30. The only thing they are missing is OMFG cheese and bacon bread, but luckily they do have really tasty salami and (pick a mayonnaise-infested salad) bread. By the way, the Japanese really love mayonnaise, and especially mayonnaise-based salads. Dude, potato salad is supposed to have MUSTARD! Anyway, so I get myself some little treats and continue along my journey. Next, we have a shoe store, some houses, and some elementary school students walking to school. The students are mostly wary of me, like I might suddenly start force-feeding them color names or ask them how they are and they just can't be arsed to talk to the gaijin in the morning. Guys, you could at least return my smile--I am not going to eat you! We come to a crosswalk; I have to wait forever to cross because all those kids are watching. On the other side is Ryubi, God's gift to office supply lovers everywhere.

Ok, office supply lovers in rural Japan. Have I ever mentioned my office supply fetish? I don't quite know why I like office supplies so much. I think perhaps it's knowing that there are so many useful things in the world. Or perhaps it's the comfort that if I ever needed something to do X, I know it exists because I saw it at the office supply store--there is something to satisfy every potential need I might have. Whatever it is, I have a tendency to spend lots of time in office supply stores. As I enter, an aura of calm descends. I scan the post-it aisle and am delighted and warmed to find 362 different sizes, in various shapes and colors. The pen aisle is particularly distracting--I usually visit it a few times and spend a while investigating each type of pen with stylic fervor. Then I get caught up in all the various pencil bags and stickers and, OH MY GOD! Are those erasers I see over there?!! I admit it, I am a junkie. But there are worse addictions, and I will never run out of pens. Perhaps for my own good, Ryubi is closed at this time of the morning so I move on.

Next to Ryubi is the Hair's Diner. Hair's Diner is a very interesting looking barber shop that the male ALT in Kubokawa seems to like and I have always been curious about it. It has a sort of modernized retro-50s decor thing going on.

Finally, we arrive at the Curious Nature Strip--a strip of land that is maybe 100 meters long and has several trees, flower patches, rose bushes and the like crammed into its tiny countenance. These are unusual in any town, even in the country, because everything MUST BE PAVED, FIGHT OFF THE NATURE BEFORE IT GETS ME, GAH!! I often stop to take pictures here, like the Sarcenet persimmons picture, because there is usually something interesting going on. The students think I am crazy because at first glance it looks like a pretty ass patch of earth covered in weeds and littered with Asahi cans. But there are roses blooming there in October!! Don't you know how cool that is?! Finally we arrive at the high school and I set off on my day of hard work teaching one class, drinking a lot of coffee, and updating my blog.

Also of interest in Kubokawa is the restaurant Miki, my all-time favorite. I've ordered the same meal there ever since I first tried it: Wa-fu steak. I think the chef must've sold his soul to the devil to learn how to cook steak like he does, but I don't really care. It is perfectly done but not yet browned, tender, juicy, and flavorful. My mouth is watering right now and I'm not even hungry. The steak is served with rice, salad, a dipping sauce made with soy sauce, scallions, daikon, and lemon, and buckwheat tea. Thursday night I went for the first time in a while and they had a cat!! I got to pet a cat!! Hoo-ray for kitties that let me pet them!

I spent some time trying to talk to the cook's wife, who was amused by my cat-induced excitement and also curious about my new green coat. You see, I found this coat that is, like, the mother of all awesome coats. It is the perfect chartreuse-y olive green of a nice peridot, medium-length with clean lines and a completely frivolous belt in the back. I am in love with this coat, you see. I bought it at Uniqlo for about $55 last week and we have been inseparable ever since. But I got another one of those nationalist pride comments from the woman at Miki--she said something about "My, what a nice shade of green, we never have green like that in Japan!" and "Oh, you Americans have such nice greens, what do you call that?" I was a bit shocked to hear this, since it's, um, from Japan and it's a COLOR. I mean, it's the most perfect green in nature, but do you really need to go that far? I decided against telling her that I bought it at Uniqlo. After all, she was trying to complement me and my country and even if we had nothing to do with it, her intention was good.

Kubokawa is also home to Sunshine, a great grocery store; Giga, a slightly-less great video store because it does not have Sex in the City, and Okitsu, the 88th most beautiful beach in Japan.

A Belated Thank You

2:00 PM JST

Thanks so much to Mom, Dad, and Grandpa for the Thailand money, to Mark for the lovely necklace, and to everyone who sent cards for my card wall! You really made my birthday special (and you made me miss you all so terribly! Darn you!!). As a thank you, allow me to present Kubokawa Town.

Friday October 15, 2004

More tasty treats

1:15 PM JST

I am now enjoying "bread ears" after my lunch. I think that's just a cool Japanese way of saying bread crusts, but I'm not entirely sure. Don't worry--they've been deep fried and covered in sugar, otherwise I would never even consider eating such a thing as bread crusts. And they say Japanese food is healthy, bah!

Oh, konnyaku, how I love thee. You are the one really healthy thing in an otherwise cholesterol-laden lunch and for that I will be eternally grateful. At least until dinnertime. Most foreigners who come here sing the praises of sushi or Asahi or pocky or some other equally famous Japanese delicacy, but I am going for the mundanest of the mundane. Konnyaku is a sort of gelatinous cake that is rich in fiber and quite a bit thicker than your average Jell-O. It's sort of an ugly taupe color, with little black flecks, and supposedly it smells bad when you cook it. I have never cooked it. Nor do I have any idea what it's made from. It doesn't have much of a taste on its own, but cook it in O-den and slap some hot mustard on it and you've got yourself a tasty treat.

Bee gone

11:50 AM JST

There is a giant bee of doom in the office right now, I am not kidding. It's about the size of your mom and it sounds like a mini lawnmower and JUST GET AWAY FROM ME YOU CRAZY ASS INSECT FROM HELL. Ok, so my coworkers just teamed up to kill the fucker, which one teacher has told me is capable of putting me in the hospital with its little stinger. They succeeded and brought the bee over to me on a piece of paper, its disgusting giant abdomen still pulsing and twitching. Every instinct I have is telling me to run, run the fuck away but they are picking it up by the wings and touching it, curious now that the danger is gone. I find it interesting how unafraid Japanese people are of insects in general. Fear of little crawly and fly-y things is so burnt into my cultural paradigm that I hesitate to pick up even the smallest spider to put it outside. I stay and take pictures because, well, who wouldn't? I think the face is the most interesting. The stinger is surprizingly small. One teacher says it is called "suzume bachi" or sparrow bee. That's because it is the size of a small sparrow. You think I am kidding. Much to my own dismay, I am not.

Wednesday October 13, 2004

Ghetto car

9:15 AM JST

So I took my beloved car Ellie-chan to the mechanic last friday because she needs new brakes. The nice thing about Japan is that most mechanics supply you with a free rental car to drive while your car is in the shop. The downside of this is that unless you go to the dealer, they give you a really old kei car that they've patched together with duct tape and 2 boxes of hyaku-en staples. The car they gave me is an excellent specimen; it sounds like the engine is driven by a rubber band instead of a timing belt, and when I turn corners, something clicks near the driver's side front wheel such that I have to pull hard through the clicks to make a turn. Whenever I drive the car, I get "Supercharger Heaven" by White Zombie in my head and I sing along with "Ghetto car, ghetto car, calling! Ghetto car on the 56, yeah!"

Happy Birthday to me!

8:53 AM JST

I am officially 25 years old today; impart to me the wisdom, oh year of age! Well, to be honest, I don't turn 25 until 4:48 AM EST. But I don't really care--hooray it's my birthday!!! I don't quite understand why people hate birthdays. I mean, I understand that people get depressed when they realize they're getting older. But we get older every day, so why not get depressed all the time? Exactly. I think it's far better to choose one day to forget about all that crap and just enjoy being you and being in the world. So here I am, yay being alive!

One thing that sort of irks me is when my parents extol the virtues of age 25. They have told me since childhood that 25 is the magical age where suddenly your life comes together and you gain a lot of wisdom. Basically, I think this is a lot of crap. What can possibly be so special about one specific age that it makes you magically grow up and get a life? Age is just a relative numbering system that someone made up because she/he wanted an excuse to have a party every year. Ok, so it's based on the solar system. But there is nothing inherent in our understanding of space/time that tells us 25 is THE AGE. So I intend to prove them wrong. I am going to be the most irresponsible, debaucherous, crazy-ass person I can be for the whole year just to spite them. Yay, newfound wisdom!

Tuesday October 12, 2004

Cellphones and Water, I am alone

8:21 PM JST

I woke to the nasty ring of my cell phone this morning at 3:30 AM. I was kept further awake by the sound of someone knocking at my window or the door to my room. I searched around but the source eluded me so I laid back down fully resolved to ignore it. Much to my frustration, I couldn't fall asleep again so I left my mind to wander in daydream. So tired today I can't hardly form a coherent thought.

Another note on Japanese pride: one teacher spent a significant amount of time explaining to me the differences between Japanese and "Western" drinking water and why Japanese water was more palatable. Wow. Now, I drink a lot of water, and I'm inclined to say that's a load of hooey, much like the eco-conscious waribashi argument. More on that some other time.

Once again it has become apparent to me how alone I am in Japan. I imagine whole worlds of people in my mind and then my eyes refocus on an empty living room and I am faced again with isolation. Sometimes being here is both the best and the worst thing that has ever happened to me. Every high is higher here and every low is unbearable. But I know that's just exaggeration born of frustration and exhaustion. I sink my teeth into the contradiction of loneliness and the selfish indulgence unique to bachelors and bachelorettes. I hope someday that I will learn how to live alone.

I am listening to Tricky and the Flaming Lips. Tomorrow is my birthday.

Saturday October 9, 2004

Geek mode is GO

1:00 PM JST

So I really have gone into full geek mode over the past couple weeks. My house is a ridiculous mess, which is disappointing, but I just can't seem to put that futon away or do the dishes or the laudry, or pick up my clothes. I cringe just looking at the kitchen mess.

The upside of geek mode is that I am so busy being a computer geek that I don't eat tons of chocolate junk and turn my brain to mush watching tons of movies. I also get to update my site and make little tweaks here and there. Plus, black pvc halloween costumes are on their way, and there's no disputing the rockingness of that!

Pockets and Nationalism

12:06 PM JST

So a couple Thursdays ago, I had class at Nishitosa. I have taken to wearing the same two pairs of black pants all the time because I hate wasting money on work clothes I would never wear outside of work and because I hate wearing out nice clothes at work when I could really care less so long as I pass the dress code police. I happened to be wearing the ugliest pants in my closet that day and the pockets are designed so that the opening runs horizontally along the hip instead of diagonally. I have worn these pants several times, mind you, without drawing comments from the students. If anything, I thought they would be amused by the flood pant styling that is oh-so-unavoidable when tall foreigners wear Japanese clothing. But what really got them were the pockets. Some students started laughing and pointing at me; when confronted, one of them actually tried to tell me that Japanese pockets are different because they're diagonal, and my, don't those American pants look funny! It took some work to convince him that I had actually bought them in Japan, at the Daiei in Kochi City. Japanese pockets are different, my ass.

Friday October 8, 2004

Barbie and why does my body hate me?

12:30 PM JST

Dear Body, Stomach: What the hell is up with this growling in the staffroom? Can't you growl and be done with it? People are staring. And to face: Why must you produce a giant crater on my chin? Is it not enough that I bought you special expensive moisturizers and pantomimed zit cream to the drug store clerk? Please cease and desist!

I really wish they would switch the vending machines to hot so that I could have hot chocolate. It's so cold in here! Rah! By the way, the Barbie links resulted from explaining the movie "Ma Vie en Rose" to a coworker--good times. Imagine a scenario in which you might try to explain a movie about how a young boy is obsessed with Barbie dolls and is thus persecuted by his neighbors and friends and his family is forced to move to a new neighborhood. Then imagine doing it in Japanese. Yeah.

Thursday October 7, 2004

Bread, Booty, and Che Guevara

12:45 PM JST

So they make this bread in Japan--and boy, do they ever make bread in Japan--that starts as a long, skinny baguette sort of bread. The length of it is cut horizontally into slices halfway through and then the slices are cut through the middle to make little loops. They then pull each loop over to alternating sides and close the bottom of them to make little leaf-shaped pockets. It is so cute. As if the cuteness of the bread were not enough to make me want to devour it, they then put cheese and bacon into the little pockets, thereby making the bread into an addiction-causing level 2 controlled substance. This bread is capable of inducing pure delight at 500 meters; I am powerless to its immediate physical presence. This bread, in a new, giant form available only on the Thursdays I don't go to Nishitosa (and those are rare, lemme tell ya), has become my lunch today. My body screams for something green and fibrous. Sorry, body, go to hell. How could I leave my desk to search for broccoli and carrots when this beautiful union of bacon and cheese and starch is sitting RIGHT THERE. This bread is reason enough for me never to become a vegetarian. (Sorry, Dad, I really do love your london broil.) I hereby dub this bread, "OMFG cheese and bacon bread."

Another thing they make in Japan is the "Oto Hime". The very first time I ever entered a bathroom in this country, I was surpized to find that a veritable electronic jungle flooded my stall as soon as I closed the door and locked it. It was like that dreaded Windows 98 jungle screen saver had run amok and somehow infiltrated Japan down to its shiny white bathroom tiles. A flowing stream, birds calling, peaceful jungle noises. "Why is this in my bathroom?" I wondered. Soon it dawned on me that the sound was there to cover my pee noises. Because, you know, it's rude and embarrassing to pee in the one room that was designed for JUST THAT. You see, "Oto Hime" means "Sound Princess" in Japanese. Most of them don't go all out with the jungle action; they just make loud flushing noises. Some have speculated that it is because of Japan's obsession with cleanliness that such ridiculous machines have become necessary, and I do agree, but I think it's a bit more complicated.

First off, I have a bone to pick. Japan isn't so much obsessed with cleanliness as obsessed with differentiation. Japanese people like everything to fit into strict categories: inside/outside, shower for cleaning/bath for soaking once you are clean, male/female, smart students/dumb students, native/foreign. In my opinion, the need for cleanliness is likely a byproduct of trying to keep everything separate. Often enough, cleanliness is not nearly so important as the separation of inside from outside. It seems likely to me that pee embarrassment is caused by a number of those deeper differentiation issues, for example: male/female. Men can make any number of rude noises in the staffroom, blow their noses, brush their teeth in the office, stop on the side of the road to pee, etc. without being considered "rude", but most women would be mortified if they so much as burped by accident in the presence of another person. This is supported by the fact that most Japanese men I've talked to don't even know that such a thing as Oto Hime exists. (Obviously, the situation in big cities is a bit different if boys are too embarrassed to poop at school.) And don't even get me started on the relaxed with your family/always smiling and polite on the outside bit. I'm sure there's a touch of "everything is happy, no one ever poops or pees in Japan" in there as well. Now that I've been here a while, I've become used to people flushing six times while they pee, to people attempting to enter the bathroom and then leaving once they discover one of the two stalls to be occupied, to the embarrassed giggles of recognition as one of us exits and the other enters the bathroom at the same time. I was even a bit embarrassed myself when I had to pee in public during my trip home--without the benefit of Oto Hime. Of course, I also bowed to two people in the Chicago airport when I had to pass between them. However, do we really need the birds?

The JTE who sits near me has taken an interest in Che Guevara lately for some reason. The whole day my ears have been picking up "Ke Gebara".

I was just invited into the office to eat some sweet potato someone brought for the teachers--it's quite delicious stuff. So some other teachers were in there, too, and the soccer coach was trying to tell me it would make me fat. Yeah, yeah, fat. So I made the pantomime for "fat" to confirm the discussion and it turns out I was wrong. Finally, someone came up with "gas". Oh. You mean fart, not fat. Saying "fart" brought on 5th grade giggles. The soccer coach said "delicious fart" for some reason. I think he was trying to convey that it was worth the resulting gas. We are not the only ones, Americans. Mmm...delicious fart.

Wednesday October 6, 2004

Back to bed

9:38 PM JST

Without brushing my teeth, no less. Somehow I managed to get YET ANOTHER set of migraines, this time one right on top of the other. I tried desperately to catch the first one with some coffee, but sadly, it was to no avail. So I went to bed at about 5:30 this afternoon and woke up to pee and now I am going back to sleep so I can maybe live through the day tomorrow. I had to miss kimono class and everything. Wah, feel sorry for me. I need a hug.

Tuesday October 5, 2004

Here are your comments, bitch

9:23 PM JST

Where bitch = Mike, thanks. Now you can write shit all over MY website to your heart's content. Too bad you're too lazy to update your own site so you have to use mine. Password loss is no excuse.

So if that wasn't an indicator, I've been playing on the inter-web with databases, which are both easier and more difficult than I expected, and comments. It turns out that the comments don't need a table, and that makes Shanas happy.

Monday October 4, 2004

Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...

9:24 PM JST

Well, I have made some changes around here. Mostly what happens when I sit down with the intent of making changes, though, is that I find 56 different things I want to do and proceed to read about them all at once. Then I get nothing done. So tonight, we finally have the new face of Sarcenet. Tomorrow, I could have comments--if I can convince myself that one table might not be SO bad. Someday, I might even have jucier php or javascript. Hell, let's go all out and dream of databases, holy mySQL, Batman!

No, don't write me about David Bowie. I don't care.

Friday October 1, 2004

This is the last update, I promise!

11:07 PM JST

Ever feel like you just want a man to hold you? Well, here's one solution.

Quote of the day: "The roads don't love you, and they still won't pretend to." If you can tell me where that's from, I'll do something really nice for you.

P.S.

12:24 PM JST

I now have 2 entries on the Mirror Project!!

• Kochi Train 1
• Kochi Train 2

Also, to Mike-you don't yak much, Jak. As soon as you start updating your blog regularly, I will add comments to my pages. Hah.

October, will you be mine?

11:55 AM JST

OK, I'll admit it. I love October. It is my absolute favoritest month ever. Here's why:

• It's starting to cool off and the leaves change, a very exciting and energetic time of year. School starts, everything is new and changing.
• Halloween. Seriously, I was born 2.5 months early just so's I could be in time for Halloween. I _make_ costumes. How could this not be my time of year?
• I can snuggle into a cardigan with a hot mug of tea in front of anything electronical and feel cozy.
• My birthday, hells yeah. Any of alls y'all that pretend not to like your birthdays are just deluding yourselves. You love it and you know it.
• It's comfortable outside and I can run for the train without needing a shower afterward.
• The birthstones are opal and tourmaline, two of my favorite gemstones.
• Suntory makes a lovely drink called Natchan that actually sucks most of the year but is wonderful and grapelicious in the fall. It changes with the seasons.
• Calbee makes sweet potato chips that are only available in the fall. Tasty!
• The smell of woodsmoke in the air!
• Did I mention Halloween?
• It's my birthday in 2 weeks, deshou!!! Birthday, birthday, woo, woo!!
• Pumpkins are fucking cool!